Author: dirtybitchblog

Welcome to the madness.

My name is KA, I’m a wife, mother, author, blogger, soap maker, and run of the mill badass bitch. I’ve had a wild life, full of close calls, insane situations, tough lessons, fuckboys, and real talk. Some of my stories may seem insane, but I promise you, I couldn’t make this shit up if I tried.

I created this blog as an outlet for all of my crazy. As a reformed wild child living in the suburbs with her family, my life is still chaos most days, just a tad more benign than before.

Be a girl with a mind, a bitch with an attitude, and a lady with class.
— Some garbage meme I found on the internet.

The idea for this blog came to me during my ‘Mommy Me Time’, which is basically just code for sitting on the back porch toking on my vape pen and playing Candy Crush. Because sometimes mama just needs a little Indica to take the edge off all the middle-class comfort. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not hating on living comfortably and happy. It’s just that sometimes the routine of every day gets a tad soul-crushing for a girl with a wanderers heart.

So, I was sitting there, a nice body high brewing, thinking about all the crazy shit I used to get into, and suddenly it hit me–I need to share this shit. I’d been doing something on my facebook page called “Story Time” where I’d tell funny stories from my past, and people liked it, so what if I took it to the next level?

When I’d come down from my happy place still thinking it was a good idea, I went to work creating this blog. And the subsequent 15 other accounts in order to start one little blog because Jesus FUCK there is a hell of a lot more involved with creating a social media network for a new venture than you’d think. Then came the hard part–what the fuck was I going to say with this new platform?

There would definitely be stories, I had them in abundance and people seemed to find my misguided youth entertaining. I have a soap company, and I’ve always been obsessed with all things beauty so tips and tricks from my hoe days and beyond were a given. Even though I’m only thirty, I’ve lived a LOT of life and have a ton of lessons from past relationships (both romantic and platonic) and I’ve always been the person, among whatever group I was in, that people would come to with their problems. So, naturally, I decided that advice was going to be something that would inevitably end up as a common theme here.

Lastly, I thought of work. I run four small businesses, as an indie author, graphic designer, soap maker, and subscription box entrepreneur. Earlier this year, I was laid off from my corporate finance job at a company I’d worked for, for more than a decade due to restructuring. Most people would’ve freaked the hell out, but I saw it as a blessing. With a generous severance in hand, I took my three boxes of personal items and set out on what I’d hoped would be the wildest adventure of my life. I’m still in the thick of things, and so far, it’s been quite an adventure, one I want to share.

Now, here I am, writing my very first blog post for this brand new adventure, and I’m wondering what the fuck I got myself into. Maybe it’s my Aries sun and my Scorpio moon, but I’m an all or nothing kind of bitch. The only way I know how to be productive at all, is to have so much to do that I think I’ll never get it done, it’s that ‘working best under pressure’ thing on crack. So either I’m so busy I can’t breathe, or doing absolutely nothing. Since doing nothing doesn’t pay the electric bill, there’s only one other option for me.

So, come on this journey with me, listen to my rambling every Tuesday and Friday, ask me for advice, read my tips and tricks, and let’s rule the world.